This is the time of year where Americans count their blessings and acknowledge all the people, places and things they’re thankful for. It would seem a daunting task to most, but every year there’s some guy who tries to list all the things he’s truly thankful for.
Or, there’s the type of person who dedicates a Facebook post to each day of November, one by one listing off a variety of blessings.
Everybody always says things like freedom, family and football.
Well, yeah, I’m thankful for those things too, but those are kind of the standard, go-to answers.
That person with the daily blessings blog typically gets to about Nov. 12 by the time they’re scraping the bottom of the barrel. By the end of the month, they’re thankful for text messaging, crock pots and microwavable bacon.
But this year, I’m going to be that guy.
I counted my blessings.
I don’t mean to brag, but I came up with hundreds.
I thought about listing them all, or maybe boiling down a Top 10.
But once I got past Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, most of the items on my Thanksgiving list were electronic gadgets.
It’s not just that I’m thankful for technology. I’d be helpless without it, specifically the Internet. It’s like having the world’s most intelligent human as your best friend.
Need to tie a tie?
Just ask Google.
How do you cook a perfect hard-boiled egg?
Need to change the timing belt in car?
Is sasquatch real?
How long can you leave mayonnaise in direct sunlight before it becomes toxic?
The Internet knows the answers to all these questions and more. The Internet even knows the answer to questions I never realized I care about, like how many jelly beans can fit inside a Boeing 747.
Before you go running for a computer or smarthphone, it’s supposedly about 2,587,438,985.
Eventually, Google and Yahoo and Bing are going to make school entirely irrelevant. Where’s the importance of learning things when you can just ask the Internet.
Technology, in today’s world, has the potential to do to general learning what the calculator did to long division decades ago.
Garrett Rudolph is the managing editor of The Chronicle. He can be reached at 509-826-1110 or via email at firstname.lastname@example.org.